


hey, hey, wouldn't it be great, great

by bottlefullofarsenic



Series: The Slowtown Trilogy [1]
Category: Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Carnival, Kinda, Multi, Nightmares, Polyamory, Self-Harm, a LOT of references, but you do see it, it's not actually done in the story, pete patrick dallon and brendon are just mentioned, sort of a songfic if you squint, too many actually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-20
Updated: 2016-10-20
Packaged: 2018-08-23 15:58:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8333644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bottlefullofarsenic/pseuds/bottlefullofarsenic
Summary: “I thought that it was against Slowtown rules to pick the apples,” Josh joked, and Jenna scoffed.“As if. The forest loves us, don’t you?” she said, shouting the last part into the air. The wind whistled through the trees as if in answer, and a leaf fell down onto Jenna’s nose. “She agrees with me,” she continued. Tyler laughed and Josh nodded in agreement, three crooked and 24-carat smiles gleaming into the trees and the shadows inside.-_-_-_-_-or the beginning of the end. part one of three.





	

Leaves dragged themselves along the pavement, warm breezes stirring them up. The wind gently guided them over the freshly trimmed grass, and they paused for a moment before starting up again in their adventure.

Skeletal trees lined the edge of the grass, oranges and yellows and reds and purples attached to the black branches. Only a few green leaves were left, stubbornly staying on the branches while the others floated down to their death. The trees clacked and clicked as the breeze caused them to collide together, creating a cacophony with the whistling of the wind and the gentle swishes of the leaves.

Some of the trees left behind fruit, such as lemons and apples, and if you walked underneath the darkened branches there was a good chance you would step onto a rotting one. The leaves covered them up, and the brown fruit with the purples and oranges and reds made for a hauntingly pretty picture.

A hundred feet into the dying forest, the ground turned rocky and dropped, the cliff leading down to violent and powerful waves and the cymbal-like crashes of the water against the vertical surface. The musky scent of the dying leaves and the salty tang of the sea mixed, along with the sickeningly sweet scent of the rotting apples and the sharp fragrance of the fallen citrus.

The cliff was attached to an island, an island which was unbelievably tiny but infinitely large at the same time. There was a blue lighthouse on the shore, guiding ships to the island. The shore dissolved into the warm-colored forest, which led a ways until you found the town on the island. The buildings and houses were all colored cheerfully, pastels and neons, saturated and bright.

In the direct center of the island there was an amusement park, a ferris wheel proudly standing tall along with the small roller coaster and penny arcades and carnival games that buzzed with laughter and happiness.

The forest curled around the back of the amusement park, and playgrounds and houses littered the forest, filling in the places where the trees didn’t grow.

On the edge of the cliff, three individuals sat.

They were two boys, one girl. Henna hair, chocolate eyes, ukulele string hands and banded arms, deafening but silent; Tyler. Rose petal curls, sienna eyes, drumstick arms and cosmic mind and silivicous body, razor-sharp but cotton soft; Josh. Saffron locks laced with pieces of the sky, periwinkle eyes, regal and dignified but modest and kind; Jenna.

Tyler was softly kicking his feet, and every time his heels collided with the cliff face a bit of rock chipped off, sailing down into the swirling foam. Josh was fiddling with two sticks he had found, banging them against his thighs and the edge of the rock, like he was playing invisible, silent drums. Jenna, sat between them, was looking off at the horizon, baby blue eyes fixated on the distant waves. Her left hand was intertwined with Tyler's right one, and her right hand was placed behind Josh, the support of her leaning backward.

“Why don’t you look at the sea, Tyler?” Jenna said after a couple moments of silence, turning her head to look at the man on her left. His eyes were fixated on a leaf he had picked up on the way there; it was purple and red, some orange mixed in along the edges. It was very pretty, but there were many others just like it behind them in the mountains of leaves in the forest.

Tyler shrugged. “I don’t know,” he said simply, and released the leaf so that it floated down the drop into the waves below. He watched it go down; Jenna followed its path as well, and out of the corner of her eye she could see that Josh’s hands stilled as he watched the leaf.

The leaf drifted peacefully down, until the first water droplets hit it, and then its movements were jerky and unrefined. The first wave barely scraped it, and then the water was relentless, slamming the leaf against the cliff face until it was no longer visible.

A few minute’s silence rang through the air, Jenna looking again at the horizon and Josh resuming his drumming with the two sticks. Tyler began fiddling with a string hanging from his t-shirt collar.

“The sun’s going down,” Josh said after a while, stopping his drumming again. Tyler looked up at him, squinting his eyes in the sunshine.

“Time to go home, I guess,” he replied, and swung his legs back over the cliff to stand up. He held Jenna’s hand as she pulled herself up, her hand delicate and soft, his hand calloused and rough. As soon as Josh had tossed the blackened sticks over the edge and into the sea below, Jenna grabbed his hand to help him up.

They trekked into the forest, which was normally frowned upon, as the locals cautioned others not go in. However, the three were used to the seemingly sharp turns and threatening angles of the trees. Thaw the wood’s core, and the forest in return will give you the secrets to pass safely through her.

Tyler reached up as they were walking, picking a perfectly ripe apple and biting into it. Josh looked over at the crunching noise and smiled slightly. Jenna swung both of her hands, sending Tyler and Josh’s with them.

“I thought that it was against Slowtown rules to pick the apples,” Josh joked, and Jenna scoffed.

“As if. The forest loves us, don’t you?” she said, shouting the last part into the air. The wind whistled through the trees as if in answer, and a leaf fell down onto Jenna’s nose. “She agrees with me,” she continued.

Tyler laughed and Josh nodded in agreement, three crooked and 24-carat smiles gleaming into the trees and the shadows inside.

-_-_-_-_-

“... I’ll cure you of disease,” Tyler sang out the final note, giving one last impressive strum to the ukulele before setting it down. Jenna and Josh clapped, Jenna giving a whoop.

They were sitting in the living room of their shared cabin, right on the edge of the woods that encompassed most of the island. A fire was lit, giving the open space an ember-like glow. Of course, they could've just turned the lights on, but it was prettier this way. Jenna and Josh were on the floor in front of Tyler, who was sitting on the floor as well with his ukulele.

“They’d love you if you performed, Tyler,” Jenna complemented, and Tyler gave a shy smile before looking down.

“Thanks, Jenna,” he mumbled, blushing slightly. Jenna gazed warmly at him, a moment of silence passing through the room. It was broken by Josh giving a thumbs up to both of them.

“Very nice. I love being the third wheel, feels great,” he said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. Jenna shoved him away, his shoulder almost hitting the ground, and he pushed back, resulting in the two playfully fighting each other.

“C’mon, guys,” Tyler reprimanded, voice getting stronger but the blush still there. His voice wasn't very harsh, though. Josh reached over and shoved Tyler, causing the coffee-haired boy to startle, but join in the fight.

It ended with Tyler and Jenna both on the ground, Josh lying dead-weight on top of them. The fire-lit room was filled with Jenna’s protests and Tyler’s quieter admonitions.

“Get off of my chest, you heavy… rock!” Jenna laughed at the bubblegum boy, struggling to think of an insult while trying to shove Josh’s upper body off her. Tyler had given up, lying flat on the ground while Josh’s knees dug into his chest. He flinched when Josh ran his knee over Tyler’s stomach, fiery pain following the shorter’s move.

“Never!” Josh crowed, pinning Jenna’s arms to her sides and beginning to tickle her. Her silver bell laugh floated through the small cabin’s room; Tyler was sure that they would wake up their neighbors.

Getting the playful urge back, Tyler attacked the backs on Josh's knees where he knew the boy was especially ticklish. Josh gave a loud yelp and clapped a hand over his mouth, giving Jenna the upper hand. She crawled out from under Josh and pinned him so that now Josh and Tyler were the ones laying down, and Jenna was lying dead-weight on them.

"Revenge!" She yelled, tickling them both. Tyler wiggled, trying unsuccessfully to get away from her grasp. Josh, writhing beside him, elbowed Tyler in the ribs in his attempt to get Jenna off. Tyler pinned Josh's arm down, and Jenna took the opportunity to attack Tyler.

"Hey, I was helping you!" Tyler protested, voice cracking wildly. Josh stopped fighting so much, laughing at Tyler's voice.

"I win," Jenna replied cheekily, and she stopped moving, going limp. The three of them lay there, catching their breath and calming down from the exertion of their playfight.

"I don't want to get up," Tyler announced after a while of them just sitting there. Jenna and Josh hummed their agreement. Jenna shifted so that now she had wedged between the two boys, Josh on her left, Tyler on her right.

“We really gonna do this?” Josh asked, but he didn’t seem too bothered, and Tyler felt Josh reach his arm over both Jenna and Tyler, resting it on Tyler’s chest. Jenna buried her face into Tyler’s neck, and Tyler curled into her, Josh behind wrapping his arms completely around them. They drifted off like that, a mess of limbs and warmth on the carpeted floor of the cabin.

-_-_-_-_-

The rain cascaded down, battering the ground to a beat no one but the clouds could hear. The blinding flash of lightning split the sky in two, leaving behind a split second of glowing air. The pounding drumming of thunder soon followed, temporarily drowning out the quieter taps of the rain.

Tyler quickly walked down the road, hoodie pulled down over his face and hands jammed in his pockets. He was running from someone behind him, he couldn’t see who they were, but he could feel their presence. No one was outside tonight, the hour of the day and storm contributing factors. You could imagine his surprise, then, when he saw someone ahead of him.

As he got closer, Tyler realized that the person was Tyler himself. Something was off about him, though. When he got closer, Tyler realised what it was. Not-Tyler had red eyes, and was smiling mischievously. His neck and hands were completely black, blending in with the obsidian streets behind him.

“ _ **Hello, Tyler,**_ ” he said, voice lower than actual Tyler’s, but still his nonetheless. Tyler recognized that voice, heard it every day in his mind. Blurryface.

“ _ **That’s right, it’s me,**_ ” Blurryface continued, and he circled Tyler, who was now frozen. He was waiting for the inevitable onslaught of insults that usually came every night like this.

“What do you want?” Tyler stammered, voice going higher in fear. Blurryface smirked.

“ _ **So bold, goner,**_ ” he replied, using his favorite nickname for Tyler. It immediately had its effect on him.

“I’m a goner,” Tyler mumbled, shaking his head slightly. Blurryface smiled.

“ _ **That’s right. But don’t you worry, I won’t bother you right now. You’ll have fun soon enough,**_ ” he said cryptically, and much to Tyler’s confusion, he disappeared.

Tyler continued on his way again, this time much more nervous. He pulled his hoodie tighter around him, flinching at the bolt of lightning in the sky and the following thunder. He continued this way for what seemed like years upon years.

He jumped when he looked up slightly, seeing another figure in front of him. However, it wasn’t Blurryface. It was his mom.

“Mom?” Tyler asked, confused, but as soon as he had spoken, she collapsed. Tyler ran over to her, getting scared, rolling her over to look at her face. Much to his horror, she didn’t have a face; the features were blurred to a point that he couldn’t make out anything.

“Tyyyyy… _**lerrrrr…**_ “ she groaned, voice changing to Blurry’s halfway through his name.

Tyler leapt away from her, beginning to run away, looking for someone to help. Anyone he encountered, however, soon turned into the blurred mess that his mother resembled. As he turned to go back to his mother, he saw a puff of breath that was not his own, coming from behind him.

He started running, chills travelling up his spine. As soon as he got back to his mother, his panic turned into terror. She was gone, nothing remaining. He sprinted away from her, tears beginning to run down his cheeks from fear.

“I’m a goner, somebody catch my breath,” he murmured to himself, trying to calm himself down. “I wanna be known by you, I wanna be known by you.”

He kept frantically singing the song to himself, pulling his hood up so that if you could see him, you couldn’t see his face at all.

“I’ve got two faces, Blurry’s the one I’m not,” Tyler mumbled. He jumped when he saw Blurryface appear next to him suddenly, sprinting down the street to get away. “I need your help to take him out,” he continued, and as soon as he said that, he saw a flash of a face. Jenna. Josh. He slowed to a stop, their warmth and happiness filling him slowly.

Their faces were obscured suddenly, Blurry trying to maul their faces the same way he had done to his mother and the countless others. Tyler ran again, the tears coming faster now, lyrics mashing together with his stuttering and crying.

“Don’t let me be gone,” he mumbled breathlessly, and to his horror he realized his voice was lowering, just like Blurry’s voice was. He flinched as he felt two hands on his shoulders, pausing him in his tracks.

“Don’t worry, we won’t,” two voices said, overlapping. Tyler whipped around to see Jenna and Josh there, both with concerned smiles on their faces.

They were a stark contrast to Tyler; he was drenched and dull, tears running down his cheeks, shivering from the cold, hands trembling. They were warm, almost glowing, bright and luminous in their beauty. He had never been so happy to see them, letting out a sob as he reached out to touch them.

Only for both to dissolve into the nebulous dark, leaving Tyler gasping for air.

“DON’T LET _ME BE **GONE!**_ ” he screamed, hands clutching the emptiness where they once were. He sobbed, dropping to his knees. The sound of Blurryface’s screaming filled his head, and he clutched at his ears, trying to force the terrible sound out of his mind.

“Don’t let me be gone, don’t let me be, don’t let me be,” he whimpered to himself, rocking back and forth on his knees. He was startled again by a soft hand on his shoulder, but he no longer believed the comfort, instead vehemently pushing it off his shoulder.

“Tyler,” the gentle voice of Josh said hopelessly. Tyler cried harder. What kind of cruel joke was Blurryface playing now? As if he had said his name, Blurryface’s screaming intensified, almost as if the demon was laughing at him. Tyler screamed in agony.

“Tyler!” Jenna pushed, and Tyler opened his eyes to find that he was not soaked to the bone, kneeled on the harsh ground, but curled on the floor of the cabin, the fire dying out, the sun still sleeping and the two people he loved in the world looking at him with worry.

He surged towards them, sobbing into Jenna’s shoulder as he clutched at Josh’s shirt, pulling them closer, starved for contact.

“Was it the dream again?” Jenna asked gently, pulling him pack slightly so that she could see his face. Josh softly wiped the tears that had fallen down his cheeks.

“N-no,” he choked out. “It was different this time, he didn’t make fun of me or, or, hurt me,” Tyler explained, struggling to breathe. “He - he took you a-away from me… “ he trailed off, tears starting up again as he hugged them close.

Jenna and Josh exchanged a look before guiding Tyler to lay down again, this time him in the middle. Jenna was facing him, and she took to rubbing his hair as Josh wrapped his arms around the tearful boy, chest heaving with sobs. Soon they drifted off again, tears drying and staining Tyler’s cheeks as his eyes fluttered underneath their lids.

-_-_-_-_-

Tyler woke up again a few hours later, and almost panicked when he saw Jenna was not there in front of him. He calmed down once he heard Jenna softly curse as she dropped something in the kitchen, and Josh sleepily tighten his arms around Tyler.

He let his head lean back, looking out the window at the sun, who was slowly making her way across the sky, filling the world with her brilliance. The trees at the bottom of the frame swayed, and Tyler could hear the wind whistling outside. The only sound was of Jenna cooking and the wind, but it was subdued.

“Are you awake?” Josh’s low voice filled the silence. Tyler nodded, eyes still fixated on the window. He felt Josh pull away from him, and he sat there for a little bit before sitting up.

“I think Jenna made breakfast,” Josh continued, standing up. Tyler pulled his gaze away from the window to watch the roseate-haired boy walk through the doorway into the kitchen. Tyler quickly got up and hurried after him; he had felt a sinking feeling in his stomach, almost as if he were falling through the floor.

“Good morning,” Jenna said cheerfully, kissing both Josh and Tyler on the cheek. She set two plates in front of them, and sat down across from the two boys. The eggs were a little overcooked, the toast a bit burned, but it was perfect all the same. Tyler wolfed it down, suddenly feeling as if he was starving. Josh ate his a little slower, but only barely, and Jenna stared at them both with a smirk on her face, before shaking her head and looking down, murmuring something that sounded like, “Boys…”

“Thanks for the food, Jenna,” Josh replied, mouth stuffed so that both Tyler and Jenna could barely make out what he was saying.

“You make the breakfast next time, then,” she said in reply, and Josh shrugged before resuming his meal.

“Okay,” he mumbled, scraping off his plate.

Tyler got up, finished with his food, and dropped his plate into the sink. He was about to walk up the stairs when Jenna interrupted him.

“I was serious last night, Tyler. You could seriously perform your songs, people would love you,” she said nonchalantly, and Tyler paused with his foot on the bottom stair.

“I… I’ll think about it,” he stammered, and his feet began to grow numb, a sign of his anxiety. “Socks, I need socks,” he mumbled to himself, and practically sprinted up the stairs.

Josh turned to look at Jenna, who looked upset.

“I don’t think we can tell him yet, Jenna.”

“I know, Josh. But we can’t keep this quiet forever, people will start to wonder. Our families are already worried,” she sighed, pushing her food around her plate. Josh nodded slowly, staring at his plate.

“We can talk to Pete and Patrick maybe? Brendon, Dallon?” he suggested, and he looked up to see Jenna shrug, and to his horror he saw a tear roll down her cheek. He quickly got up and ran over to sit next to her, Jenna resting her head on his shoulder.

“His nightmares are getting worse, and now with this… I think that would be good, he could see his friends again,” she replied, sniffling.

-_-_-_-_-

Tyler sat in front of the mirror, shirt on the bed behind him. He was staring, mesmerised, at himself.

His stomach and chest was a mottled canvas of purple and red and black and yellow bruises, self inflicted cuts in between the splotches of color under his skin. It was almost as if there was a line where the injuries stopped, his arms, collarbones, shoulders and neck unaffected. Tyler’s hands shook as he looked at himself, knowing that it was all his work. It left a sick feeling in his stomach, a combination of horror and twisted pride.

“Blurry, I think I’ve done enough already,” he murmured to himself, and immediately the voice in his mind replied to him.

“ ** _I think so too. You look perfect to me,_** ” Blurryface purred, and Tyler felt a nauseating surge of pride at the praise.

‘ _I’m not supposed to feel good about this,_ ’ he thought guiltily to himself, and Blurryface became angry.

“ ** _Of course you are, look what you’ve done! This is exactly what you deserve. Maybe a little more, but we’ll get to that after you’ve healed a bit. You don’t want those two to find out, now do you?_** ” Blurryface sneered, and Tyler immediately felt ashamed. “ _ **Besides, that pink boy contributed some, don’t you see that new one? It’s from him.**_ ”

“Oh,” he trailed off, spotting the bruise put there by Josh. It was hard to make out, hidden among the others, but it was a shade lighter than them. He jumped when he heard footsteps on the stairs, adrenaline and fear quickly rushing through his body.

" ** _Quick, get your shirt on!_** " Blurryface hissed, and Tyler tugged it over his head just in time as Jenna opened the door.

"C'mon, we're going into town," she said, and he nodded his head.

"Okay," he replied, and followed after her. He glanced at the mirror again as he left, the image of the bruises and cuts burned into his mind. He didn’t notice as one of his eyes had flashed red instead of the regular coffee color.

-_-_-_-_-

"I'm gonna get that alien," Josh grumbled, giving another five dollars to the vendor. The woman smiled at him and gave him five more rings.

"Dude, it's rigged," Tyler complained after Josh failed, yet again, to get the ring around the bottle.

"It may be, but I'm still winning that alien," Josh replied. The alien in question was the crown prince of the carnival game, hanging from the support in the middle of the tent. It was at least a few inches shorter than Josh, and it was holding up a peace sign, it's tongue poked out.

"Lemme try," Jenna said, grabbing a ring from Josh. She chucked it at the bottles; it spun around for a while before settling around the neck of the middle one.

"YES!" Josh cheered, thrusting his hands up into the air. He gasped as the vendor handed him the alien, almost squealing like a little kid in joy.

“Now can we please go on some rollercoasters? I’ve been dying to go on the new one,” Tyler said, pulling Jena and Josh along, the former hugging his prize like it was his lifeline.

The one Tyler was referencing, the Pantaloon, had a huge line, which Jenna and Josh were not enthused about standing in.

“We can go get some food,” Josh suggested, but was quickly shot down by the reasoning that no one wanted to throw up on the ride.

The excuses for not standing in the line continued, ranging from the fact that Josh had nowhere to put his new alien friend, to that there was the very small possibility that the ride would close before they even got on it, considering that it was around noon and the park was open till midnight.

“Wow, look at that, we’re at the front of the line,” Tyler flatly said after a while, and the two others looked up to see that they were next on the rollercoaster.

“Oh,” Josh replied, walking after Tyler past the gate. Jenna rolled her eyes, taking the life-size alien from Josh and giving it to the operator of the ride, who gave them a look before setting it down beside her.

“This is supposed to be the best one yet in the whole Slowtown Spectacular Amusement Park,” Tyler rattled off as they were strapped in. Luckily enough, the rollercoaster had seats that could hold three comfortably, and so they sat side by side, Jenna in the middle.

The seats lurched as the ride slowly started, the straps cutting into Tyler’s chest and stomach. A cold knife of pain stabbed through his body, but he shoved it down, determined to not interrupt the fun.

“You are the Pantaloon, and get ready to lose your mind,” a deep voice announced, and Tyler jumped for a second, thinking it was Blurryface. But, no, it was just the recording for the rollercoaster.

' _Get a grip on yourself,_ ' Tyler grumbled in his mind, focusing on the dropping sensation in his stomach from the coaster climbing.

They got to the top of the rise, Tyler holding his breath as they paused. Jenna reached across to both Josh and Tyler; Tyler grabbed her hand.

Once they fell, however, Tyler couldn’t ignore the pain anymore. Through the twists and turns of the rollercoaster, the straps dug into his stomach and chest; the bruises ached and he was pretty sure most of the cuts were reopened.

The ride was enjoyable, at least. Jenna next to him was screaming, and he could hear Josh’s whoops as he raised his arms. Tyler smiled through the pain, letting out a few yells to not alert the other two.

When he stumbled out of the seat, Jenna and Josh breathlessly laughing with each other, Tyler’s anxiety immediately rose. He could tell that he wasn’t bleeding that badly, yet, but he needed to go and patch his abdomen up as soon as possible, without the sunshine girl or bubblegum boy to notice.

Of course, fate decided that the fun was over.

He was walking as fast he could without seeming suspicious to the nearest bathroom, but Josh, of course, noticed.

“Dude, you’re really pale. Maybe we should get you something to eat?” he said, squinting concernedly at Tyler. Tyler frantically shook his head no, he was fine, but that only made Jenna look over and Josh to step towards him.

“Wait, Tyler, is that blood..?” Jenna asked suddenly, soft blue eyes widening as she walked towards the two. Josh found the spot of blood on his shirt, as well, and Tyler panicked, pushing past them both. He ignored their calls, Blurryface snarling at him.

“ ** _Look what you’ve done! They know now, you idiot. You’re such a goner, how could you think they’d ever love you? You should just say goodbye to them, and you know it,_** ” he snapped, and Tyler struggled not to cry as he pushed his way out of the theme park, walking out onto the streets to get back to the cabin, and… And then what?

He struggled to think of a plan, but he was shaken out of his thoughts by two people calling his name, and he looked behind him to see Jenna and Josh running after him, looking winded and scared. He started to run as well, but his shirt grazed over his injuries, making them hurt even more.

“Tyler, please!” Jenna called, and she seemed to almost be crying. Guilt filled Tyler, and he stopped, clutching at his stomach.

The two came closer, he pulled his hand from his shirt. It came away spotted with red.

 _'I have to get away, to stop them from finding out…'_ Tyler thought frantically to himself, and he turned to run again. He didn’t see the rock in front of him; he tripped on it, landing on his left arm and shoulder. Fiery pain licked its way across his body, and he gasped, tears streaming down his face.

“Tyler!” Josh yelled, and Tyler could hear the panic in his voice. He tried to get up, leaning on his right side, but as soon as his stomach touched the ground it exploded in pain. Tyler couldn’t help the yelp of pain that escaped from his mouth; Josh and Jenna skidded to a stop by him, talking over each other in concern and fear.

“I’m sorry,” Tyler choked, covering his face with his hands. Josh helped him up, and Jenna gasped at the blood that had seeped through his shirt, the scrapes on his shoulder and arm.

“Oh, Tyler…” Jenna said hopelessly, raking her gaze over his body. His looked shamefully at the ground, Blurryface screaming and laughing at him in his mind.

“ ** _‘Oh, Tyler?’ You hear that? She’s so disappointed in you, look at her face! I knew this would happen, I knew it, I told you to keep it a secret, but now look what happened! You’re a horrible excuse for a person, she’s crying because of you,_** ” Blurry shrieked, and Tyler winced and clapped his hand over his ears instinctively.

“Is Blurryface taunting you?” Josh asked, Tyler barely hearing him from the cacophony in his mind. Tyler nodded, eyes still fixed on the ground.

“Let’s get home, people are starting to stare.” Jenna wiped her eyes, taking one of Tyler’s arms and Josh the other. They quickly walked away from the prying eyes of the Slowtown population.

-_-_-_-_-

Tyler was sat in one of the armchairs in the cabin, shirt cast off to the side. He was avoiding Josh’s gaze as Jenna cleaned him up, eyes fixated on his lap.

As soon as they had gotten home, Josh had turned around and demanded that Tyler show them what he’d done to himself, his panic masked by anger and the desperate question of _Why?_

Tyler had done it, not looking for a fight with Josh. Both of the people he loved most in this world flinched and cried at his self-inflicted injuries, and Blurryface had gotten even louder, screaming at him to be ashamed, he should die, etc. Tyler was already being bombarded with negative things, so he blocked Blurry out, deserting him on an island in his mind where he could have his tantrum.

He looked up for a moment, watching the teardrops sparkle on Jenna’s eyelashes as she rubbed his cuts, making them sting and him to wince. She didn’t stop though, moving onto the scrapes from him falling.

Josh walked from the room, calling someone. Tyler watched him go, not paying attention to his words. The quiet murmuring from the kitchen filled the silence, however, and Tyler appreciated it. It made Blurryface’s muffled screams less apparent in his head.

“Tyler, I just want to say…” Jenna said, startling Tyler. She stopped her actions, looking up at him. He looked down at her in return, focusing on her red cheeks and sterling eyes. He mentally kicked himself from thinking that she looked prettiest this way; Blurryface began howling, and Tyler could feel the start of a migraine coming on.

“If this ever happens again, Blurryface telling you to hurt yourself… please, tell me or Josh. Please,” she begged, and Tyler felt bad enough already that he couldn’t tell her the truth.

“Okay,” he replied, voice rough from the emotions choking him. To seemingly make him feel even worse, she surged forward and hugged him, probably getting medical alcohol all over herself. He didn’t care, though, pulling her close and burying his face in her neck, struggling not to cry.

They stayed there for a while, it becoming harder for Tyler to both keep Blurry at bay and to not let the tears come forward. Josh walked in after a couple of minutes however, and Tyler pulled away from Jenna, who wiped her eyes.

Josh looked at both of them, sitting down across from Tyler. The tension was back in the room, but it was clear that Josh's anger had dissipated and now only anxiety and concern was left.

"I'm sorry," Josh said finally, and Tyler was confused.

"For what?"

"I... I don't know, for not realizing you were getting bad? It's always been a silent agreement between the three of us, to tell each other when we're sad, or something is bothering us, or something on this scale..." Josh explained helplessly, rubbing at his eyebrow. Tyler looked down, watching his hands.

"I'm sorry, too, for not telling you," Tyler responded. He wanted to scream, to say, ' _No, I'm not sorry! You should have noticed! You're the ones who know me the most!_ ' He kept it inside, though, Blurryface still shrieking away in his head.

"I called Brendon, and he's coming soon with Dallon, and Pete and Patrick, but only for a little bit," Josh continued, looking up from where he had been staring at the floor. Tyler's heart skipped a beat; of course he loved Brendon, and Pete, and all the others, but did Josh tell them..?

"They know nothing, if you're worried."

Tyler immediately calmed down, Jenna giving him a look.

Josh surprised him then, getting out of his chair and going over, pulling Tyler up and hugging him. Tyler sank into his embrace, and when he felt Jenna hug both of them he let himself cry, shoulders trembling as he was held by the two people he loved and trusted most in the world, betrayed by his actions and mind.

-_-_-_-_-

“ ** _You idiot!_** ” Blurry hissed, clutching Tyler’s shoulders in a vice-like grip, teeth bared and eyes aflame with an animal-like rage. As soon as Tyler had fallen asleep, he was transported to the black void where Blurryface usually appeared, and the personification of his anxieties was particularly furious today.

“It was inevitable- “ Tyler tried saying, but Blurry growled, gripping his shoulders tighter. He swallowed a whimper, trying not to show weakness in front of his insecurities. Blurry felt it anyway, his snarl twisting into a grin, leaning in so that Tyler could feel his breath on his lips, revolting and intrusive.

“ ** _We’re going to have fun tonight, goner,_** ” Blurryface sneered threateningly, and Tyler gulped nervously.

Suddenly, the setting changed, transforming into a familiar beach. However, it was duller in color, the waves more violent, and he could hear ominous growling behind him. Fear crept up his throat, choking him, and as he looked down at his hands (which were suspiciously numb), he saw they were dyed black.

He turned, only to see three bloody-mouthed lions stalking him, their eyes strangely human, screaming in hunger and… was that sadness? He didn’t think about it too hard, running from the trio, who immediately followed him. His breath coming fast, Tyler struggled to run on the sand, and his eyes seemed to be playing tricks on him. The beach transformed into a desert, the water dissipated into threatening grey clouds above him.

His eyes found an oasis in the distance, and he sped up, the lions behind him roaring and snarling. He skidded to a halt beside the tiny bit of water in the copse of trees, checking behind him. The lions seemed like they couldn’t come into the oasis, their roars muffled by some invisible barrier only Tyler could pass through. He glanced at his face in the water, then did a double take, entranced by his reflection.

His neck, much like his hands, was completely black, and as he watched the shadows creeped up his throat, consuming his jaw and soon enough his chin and creeping up to his bottom lip. A splitting pain erupted in his mouth as soon as the black reached his lip, and he stumbled away from the water, clutching at his mouth.

He tried to scream, nothing came out, an invisible boa constrictor tightening its muscles around his neck. He couldn’t breath, couldn’t make a sound, and he cast his eyes down to his hands. Tyler’s eyes followed the shadow’s path up his arms, the numbness spreading slowly, deadly in its intentions.

In an act of desperation, Tyler plunged his hands into the water. Immediately, the black faded, dissolving into the ominously-clear water. He scooped some of it up, forcing himself to swallow it through the choking feeling.

As he scooped more water to drink and watched the shadows go down, he regained the ability to breath, taking in deep gasps of the dry desert air. He reached down to get more of the water, only for his fingers to get partially submerged, and that was it. The water level had gone down to almost nothing; the pond had been almost full before, though.

He scooped up the last bit out water in his palm, and it was like a spell had been broken, the lions breaking through the invisible barrier. Tyler scrambled up, running again. He tried desperately to run through the sand as he held the water in the palm of his hand, but it steadily dripped, disappearing into the land.

A bolt of lightning flashed, and then rain began to fall. Tyler thought that it might've been the same water that was in the pond, but as soon as it touched him it did nothing. It was just normal rain.

The lions were catching up to him, and he drank all that he could from the slowly depleting pool of water in his hand to have more strength. The pressure finally lifted all the way off his throat, and his hands regained feeling; he started running faster.

The setting transformed again, this time into a forest closely resembling the one in Slowtown. However, each turn seemed to lead him nowhere, and he could still hear the lions perusing him.

He spotted a treehouse, and turned towards it, grabbing the ladder as soon as it was within arms reach. He caught his breath, frantically searching for the lions. He jumped when he heard a scrabbling at the tree stump, and to his horror the lions were attempting to climb the tree.

He looked around for something, anything to protect him with, but the treehouse was empty. Wait, no it wasn't. There was a can of gas and a lighter that he could've swore wasn't there before, and a harpoon that looked suspiciously like a pen.

Tyler heard the lions getting closer, and with no time to think he doused the treehouse with gas, grabbing the harpoon.

He jumped from the treehouse, and a bolt of pain shot through his body, but he ignored it the best he could and threw the lit lighter into the treehouse.

He could hear the lions roaring, and it hit somewhere in his heart; they sounded like human screams, pained and terrified. One of them jumped from the treehouse, and he scooted backwards, panicking. However, it didn't do much other than mewl, patches of its fur burned off and the burns exposing reddened skin.

He looked into its eyes, and immediately wished he hadn't. Shock and fear filled him when recognized Jenna's crystal blue eyes.

When one of the others followed the female's example, jumping from the window, flames licking at its tail, Tyler got up. It had Josh’s eyes; Tyler ran, terrified now.

He saw the cliff at the last minute, skidding to a stop a few seconds before he fell, sending pebbles over the edge. He heard the growl of the second lion and turned around, facing it. It was darker than the others, and one eye was Tyler's sienna brown, the other a scarlet like Blurry's.

He couldn’t go any further, and he held the pen-harpoon like a spear, trying to intimidate his lion-self. It jumped, and landed on the spear; Tyler’s own stomach and chest exploded in pain as the weight of the lion threw them both over the cliff. Tyler locked eyes with the lion as they fell, and the phantom pain mingled with a heavy weight that settled in his chest.

The lion had known exactly what it had done, and it had a sickening look of satisfaction in its human eyes. He looked down, seeing the water rush up, and he reached out his arms as if he could stop the impact.

He felt the shock of the water surrounding him, the lion’s roar echoing, then everything went black.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading, and i hope you enjoyed! the second part will come out (hopefully, if my motivation allows) soon. i apologize for any mistakes, i didn't have time to edit it :/
> 
> please leave a comment, it always makes my day brighter.


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